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sub_dividedI have been discovered. But! I will not let this affect my geekish obsessiveness! And, to prove it, here's some fanfiction. From Less Than Ideal. It's only the part of the fourth chapter because I swore I wouldn't end them early anymore and the second part is still in revisions. As perhaps this part should be, but I write too slowly anyway.
Less Than Ideal - Summary and Earlier Chapters here. I've just realized how awful the prologue is.
Less Than Ideal -
Chapter 4a: New Recruit (Naruto)
**********************************************
The rest of Naruto's time on the road passed without incident. The former Sound village was more than two weeks' walk away; Naruto practiced his disguise to pass the time, gradualy spending less of it in his own skin and more of it in hers. He became "Hanako" full-time when still an entire two days away. That had clearly been clearly overkill as he hadn't seen a blasted soul since then.
He was approaching by road, although not by the main one. In this season it wasn't too unusual to have the entire road to himself. If it had been up to him, Naruto would have waited until the very last minute before becoming Hanako. The Hokage's orders, however, had been explicit: better to exert himself early than to risk discovery.
Damn paranoid Tsunade, Naruto thought. He rounded the final bend and suddenly, in front of him, was the former Sound village. Akatsuki village.
It was in the same place, but it wasn't the same village. Naruto gazed at the walls, already beginning a catalogue of differences. For one thing, the Sound village he'd last seen had still been smoldering.
Orochimaru's village hadn't sprawled like this, either. Even as rubble, it had had an obvious purpose, the walls a perfect circle and the remains of buildings laid in orderly rows. The doors and windows, those that were left, had all faced the exact center of the village. Sound village had revolved around a single man with a singular vision, and its construction had reflected that.
Akatsuki village, on the other hand… It looked unsafe. New construction angled illogically and in every direction, buildings built into or over other buildings. The original wall had been completely swallowed and the new one looked temporary. Most of the buildings looked temporary as well. It was crazy; no one could guard a city like this. He couldn't imagine what the builders had been thinking, much less what Akatsuki had been thinking for letting them think it.
Screw Tsunade's orders, he thought. I'm going in over that roof over there, the one that's leaning out over that wall. Why should I join in this madness? Especially when he could sneak in the back instead.
Naruto's subterfuge was derailed when he saw that one of the guards had noticed him. The guard was leering. Maybe bright red wasn't the best color to wear, Naruto thought. Although I guess it could also have been the gold embroidery that gave me away. He sighed dejectedly as he circled around to the gate.
The front of the village, facing the main road, was a bit more ordered than the back. Before the gate was a small garrison, and before the garrison was a short line. The line consisted of ordinary cutthroats, hooligans, muscle-men, and thieves; not exactly the kind of crowd Naruto had been expecting. None of them looked like ninja. He caught himself before he shrugged; that wouldn't have been in character. Raising an eyebrow disdainfully, he took a place at the back of the line.
Heads turned. "Hanako" was quite the looker. Naruto smiled menacingly, which was enough to discourage half of them all on its own. The others were cowed by a few sharp words from the shinobi in charge. Wimps, Naruto thought.
One ninja moved down the line, asking questions. The others stood off to the side looking bored. When it was his turn, Naruto gave the story he'd prepared. It was disinterestedly noted. Naruto wasn't sure whether that was good or not, since while he didn't want to be suspected, he also didn't want to be turned away. Most of the other applicants had some sick crime to brag about.
There was a long wait. Two shinobi started a dice game. A few applicants sat down, others struck up conversations. Naruto tried to look aloof. Hours passed, and a few more candidates sat. One fell asleep. Naruto tried to see how long he could keep the same expression without blinking. He broke three minutes. He broke seven minutes.
At eight minutes forty seconds, the shinobi in charge engaged in a whispered consultation. The sleeping man was kicked awake.
Shinobi walked down the line, pulling out men as they went. Most of the sitters were chosen, as well as those men whose stories had been particularly gruesome. Larger men, and those with obvious scars, were favored. Naruto inwardly started to curse. If he was overlooked for something stupid, like not being a well-muscled sadist… well, it would suck.
Predictably, he wasn't picked. Naruto gritted his teeth, caught himself, let his jaw relax while he narrowed his eyes instead. Two shinobi escorted the marked men through the garrison door. It closed with a decisive thunk. Naruto once again cursed his bad luck.
Inside, there was screaming.
*************************************************
I think I might have telegraphed that last line. Did I? Also, what in the world possessed me to separate Naruto when the best part of writing fanfiction is character interaction? Rhetorical question (mostly).
This was a good weekend. And it's not even over yet! So far there's been swimming and Meryl Strife having waaay too much fun as the villain.
You could consider The Manchurian Candidate a movie, or you could consider it a political sound bite and nightmare-producing machine. Either way would be correct. This is one disturbing movie. It's like they took all of the most gut-wrenching parts from the original (skull drills, knives under skin, exposed brains, choking suffocation) and did them over in color, with better special effects, and without the silly xenophobic themes and too-obvious score.
Horror films should be this gripping. I had to turn away a few times. The political messages were exaggerated but surprisingly accurate and incredibly current. And of course the acting rocked. Great movie.
Although... there was one problem. Does anyone else remember a B children's movie called Legend of the Ghost Dog? In that movie the evil villain is a liar, a crook, and a cheat. He's developing the mom out of business, he's mean to children, he hunts out of season, he dumps toxic waste (illegally), and he's an escaped murderer. He guns down baby seals from his helicopter for fun. In other words, he's ridiculously evil.
Kind of like Meryl Streep in this movie, who should be wearing a World's Most Evil Mom shirt. Not only does her suffocating behavior turn her son into a mama's boy of Norman Mailer proportions, not only does she drive away the only woman he's ever loved, not only is she purposefully terrorizing the American public for political gain, not only does she turn her son over to the Manchurian Corporation to betortured brainwashed, not only does she order him to murder two people (one of whom is the aforementioned love) - she has the gall to tell him she did it all for him. She takes advantage of his broken zombie state to molest him.
The kiss is off-screen, though, because while it is ok to show Denzel Washington biting chunks out of another man's back, it's not ok to show a little motherly affection. What is this country coming to? Go see this movie, it is awesome.
And Ian, if you're reading this: don't be afraid to drop me a line. You can leave comments even without a livejournal account.
Less Than Ideal - Summary and Earlier Chapters here. I've just realized how awful the prologue is.
Less Than Ideal -
Chapter 4a: New Recruit (Naruto)
**********************************************
The rest of Naruto's time on the road passed without incident. The former Sound village was more than two weeks' walk away; Naruto practiced his disguise to pass the time, gradualy spending less of it in his own skin and more of it in hers. He became "Hanako" full-time when still an entire two days away. That had clearly been clearly overkill as he hadn't seen a blasted soul since then.
He was approaching by road, although not by the main one. In this season it wasn't too unusual to have the entire road to himself. If it had been up to him, Naruto would have waited until the very last minute before becoming Hanako. The Hokage's orders, however, had been explicit: better to exert himself early than to risk discovery.
Damn paranoid Tsunade, Naruto thought. He rounded the final bend and suddenly, in front of him, was the former Sound village. Akatsuki village.
It was in the same place, but it wasn't the same village. Naruto gazed at the walls, already beginning a catalogue of differences. For one thing, the Sound village he'd last seen had still been smoldering.
Orochimaru's village hadn't sprawled like this, either. Even as rubble, it had had an obvious purpose, the walls a perfect circle and the remains of buildings laid in orderly rows. The doors and windows, those that were left, had all faced the exact center of the village. Sound village had revolved around a single man with a singular vision, and its construction had reflected that.
Akatsuki village, on the other hand… It looked unsafe. New construction angled illogically and in every direction, buildings built into or over other buildings. The original wall had been completely swallowed and the new one looked temporary. Most of the buildings looked temporary as well. It was crazy; no one could guard a city like this. He couldn't imagine what the builders had been thinking, much less what Akatsuki had been thinking for letting them think it.
Screw Tsunade's orders, he thought. I'm going in over that roof over there, the one that's leaning out over that wall. Why should I join in this madness? Especially when he could sneak in the back instead.
Naruto's subterfuge was derailed when he saw that one of the guards had noticed him. The guard was leering. Maybe bright red wasn't the best color to wear, Naruto thought. Although I guess it could also have been the gold embroidery that gave me away. He sighed dejectedly as he circled around to the gate.
The front of the village, facing the main road, was a bit more ordered than the back. Before the gate was a small garrison, and before the garrison was a short line. The line consisted of ordinary cutthroats, hooligans, muscle-men, and thieves; not exactly the kind of crowd Naruto had been expecting. None of them looked like ninja. He caught himself before he shrugged; that wouldn't have been in character. Raising an eyebrow disdainfully, he took a place at the back of the line.
Heads turned. "Hanako" was quite the looker. Naruto smiled menacingly, which was enough to discourage half of them all on its own. The others were cowed by a few sharp words from the shinobi in charge. Wimps, Naruto thought.
One ninja moved down the line, asking questions. The others stood off to the side looking bored. When it was his turn, Naruto gave the story he'd prepared. It was disinterestedly noted. Naruto wasn't sure whether that was good or not, since while he didn't want to be suspected, he also didn't want to be turned away. Most of the other applicants had some sick crime to brag about.
There was a long wait. Two shinobi started a dice game. A few applicants sat down, others struck up conversations. Naruto tried to look aloof. Hours passed, and a few more candidates sat. One fell asleep. Naruto tried to see how long he could keep the same expression without blinking. He broke three minutes. He broke seven minutes.
At eight minutes forty seconds, the shinobi in charge engaged in a whispered consultation. The sleeping man was kicked awake.
Shinobi walked down the line, pulling out men as they went. Most of the sitters were chosen, as well as those men whose stories had been particularly gruesome. Larger men, and those with obvious scars, were favored. Naruto inwardly started to curse. If he was overlooked for something stupid, like not being a well-muscled sadist… well, it would suck.
Predictably, he wasn't picked. Naruto gritted his teeth, caught himself, let his jaw relax while he narrowed his eyes instead. Two shinobi escorted the marked men through the garrison door. It closed with a decisive thunk. Naruto once again cursed his bad luck.
Inside, there was screaming.
*************************************************
I think I might have telegraphed that last line. Did I? Also, what in the world possessed me to separate Naruto when the best part of writing fanfiction is character interaction? Rhetorical question (mostly).
This was a good weekend. And it's not even over yet! So far there's been swimming and Meryl Strife having waaay too much fun as the villain.
You could consider The Manchurian Candidate a movie, or you could consider it a political sound bite and nightmare-producing machine. Either way would be correct. This is one disturbing movie. It's like they took all of the most gut-wrenching parts from the original (skull drills, knives under skin, exposed brains, choking suffocation) and did them over in color, with better special effects, and without the silly xenophobic themes and too-obvious score.
Horror films should be this gripping. I had to turn away a few times. The political messages were exaggerated but surprisingly accurate and incredibly current. And of course the acting rocked. Great movie.
Although... there was one problem. Does anyone else remember a B children's movie called Legend of the Ghost Dog? In that movie the evil villain is a liar, a crook, and a cheat. He's developing the mom out of business, he's mean to children, he hunts out of season, he dumps toxic waste (illegally), and he's an escaped murderer. He guns down baby seals from his helicopter for fun. In other words, he's ridiculously evil.
Kind of like Meryl Streep in this movie, who should be wearing a World's Most Evil Mom shirt. Not only does her suffocating behavior turn her son into a mama's boy of Norman Mailer proportions, not only does she drive away the only woman he's ever loved, not only is she purposefully terrorizing the American public for political gain, not only does she turn her son over to the Manchurian Corporation to be
The kiss is off-screen, though, because while it is ok to show Denzel Washington biting chunks out of another man's back, it's not ok to show a little motherly affection. What is this country coming to? Go see this movie, it is awesome.
And Ian, if you're reading this: don't be afraid to drop me a line. You can leave comments even without a livejournal account.
